How I dragged myself to death…


I’m ‘John’ and when I was a student of 12th class I got the habit of smoking and during those days; I did not know that this habit could take my life one day. After graduating, I started my own venture I had always been passionate about. After initial struggle, my business gradually started to do well; I got married with a very beautiful girl ‘Alessia’.

By the grace of god I was blessed with two children, a son ‘Alvin’ and a daughter ‘Amie’, I loved my kids very much. My life was complete, what else could have one asked for?

Unfortunately, smoking had become a very important part of my life too. I tried but I couldn’t develop a will power. I failed to quit smoking.

Whenever I used to smoke at home, my wife, my two kids, and parents; everybody in the family including our pet cat Max used to get affected. So I used to go out and smoke. Max is with us since childhood. My kids were fastly growing up and they understood everything.
One day I was watching television and smoking. Nobody was at home so I had the full liberty. Suddenly I started having chest pain. By another 15-20 minutes, it grew more, and more, and I wished if somebody could be around me. In panic, I called Alessia… then I shouted for my dad… since nobody was at home, I don’t know when did I fainted and fell on floor.

My parents returned from their evening walk and seeing me lying like this, they immediately called my wife who quickly reached home and drove me away to the hospital which was around 4.5 kms away from our location.

The doctor checked me properly and there was a serious lung infection. I was restricted from having oily food and spicy things. I was immediately put on heavy medication and there were these many instructions that I must start following before the problem could turn worse.

In another incident, my wife received a call from our daughter Amie’s school. She was studying in standard 1. We had to rush her to the doctor immediately as she was choking and we were quite nervous, we couldn’t understand what was wrong with her. After about 40 minutes of examination and lung test, it was revealed that she has developed some symptoms of asthma at such a tender age. Doctor suspected either the problem could be since birth or if somebody in the family was a chain smoker because of which she too was passively affected.

This broke me further. I too had not been keeping up a good health as I was not able to control my habit or could think to quit smoking and I still continued smoking. Due to my sedentary lifestyle, I wasn’t taking proper diet and sleep, which was making my condition adverse day by day.
I was warned several times by my doctor and also by my family but I never listened to them.

Finally, one day I learnt that I have been diagnosed with lung cancer. I had just 3 months to survive, after hearing this, my heart sunk. Even if I start with immediate therapies and treatment, only my life could be extended but my chances of survival was nearly nil. Chemotherapy would have cost my entire savings, in fact much more than that. I didn’t had much savings and this made me start to worry that will my family survive, my aged parents medicine, my kids schooling, other expenditures to run the home and my dad didn’t had enough pension that all the needs could be fulfilled.

Apart from regretting and blaming myself, I could do nothing. I didn’t have enough strength to work like before or arrange enough funds for my family so they wouldn’t have to suffer later in life. My last days had almost come and I started to count them 7, 6, 5… and don’t know when I’ll be gone…

Learning to love yourself and cherishing this one life of yours is the biggest motivation in itself.

What is your inspirational or motivational story? Write your story and do share with us here at


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here